Women’s Rights push Dads and Children Aside
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IT is hard to fathom that the law would exclude a loving father from the life of his child on social policy grounds. Yet this is what occurred recently in NSW when a non-biological lesbian mother successfully applied to have the name of the father, a sperm donor, struck off the birth certificate of his IVF-conceived 10-year-old daughter and replaced with her own.
This kind of court decision, however, will come as little surprise to many dads, all too familiar with the operation of family law in Australia. Usually women’s rights trump the needs of fathers and children, as is again being demonstrated by the Gillard government’s changes to the Family Law Act, which will make it easier for separated mothers to exclude fathers from children’s lives.
Gay rights are being given priority as well. Ironically, however, the landmark birth certificate decision, which has been hailed as a victory for same-sex parenting, is undermining the arguments for gay marriage by ignoring the important role of fathers in rearing children.
Separated fathers wishing to maintain a meaningful relationship with their children have long felt the deck was stacked against them. The best outcome most could hope for was to be allowed to see their children every second weekend and half the school holidays.
If a mother were determined to end all contact with the children’s father, a nightmare awaited. As detailed in John Hirst’s groundbreaking 2005 Quarterly Essay, Kangaroo Court: Family Law in Australia, the legal tactic employed was to make false accusations of child sexual assault against the father. Based on unproven allegations of abuse, the Family Court would decide that a child could be at risk of harm and withdraw the father’s limited access visits.
The Family Court denied a bias towards women. Its former chief justice, Alistair Nicholson, constantly claimed that the best interest of the child was paramount.
Yet there is little doubt that women’s rights were prioritised over those of fathers and children.
This situation started to change in 2006 due to the Howard government’s family law reforms. The Family Law Act was amended to introduce a rebuttal presumption of equal shared parental responsibility, which required parents to consult with each other and reach agreement about important issues in the child’s life. Provided there was no evidence of domestic violence, child abuse or ongoing conflict, the court was required to consider equal shared parental responsibility and, if granted, then consider ordering equal parenting time or at least substantial and significant time for fathers.
Since 2007, militant single-mother groups, abetted by sympathetic lawyers and academics, have been lobbying federal Labor to water down the Howard reforms.
The anti-shared parenting campaigners claim that women and children are being forced to have contact with violent and abusive fathers. At least six reviews have been commissioned to prove this “fact”, yet none of the subsequent reports contain hard evidence that rebuttable shared parenting is exposing women and children to harm.
The Gillard government has got around this by deciding to redefine family violence. The Family Law Legislation Amendment (Family Violence and Other Measures) Bill 2011 has expanded the definition to include psychological harm, financial abuse and other threatening behaviour that controls, coerces or causes fear. Significantly, the government has ruled out requiring that fear of family violence be “reasonable”.
Based on past experience in the Family Court, the expanded definition will create a new and open-ended legal means by which good fathers are banished from the lives of their children. There also no longer will be any penalty (no cost orders) for knowingly making false allegations, and the friendly parent provisions, requiring parents to be supportive of each other’s role in their children’s lives, will be substantially diminished.
The amending bill is due to be read for third time in the Senate in coming weeks and will pass on the votes of Labor and Greens senators. Complaints about the kangaroo justice dished out to fathers in the Family Court used to be the No 1 source of complaints to the offices of MPs. MPs should prepare themselves for a repeat when the new laws start making children fatherless.
Meanwhile, the social policy goal of advancing same-sex parental rights is also being used to justify denying children the right to know their fathers. However, the disregard shown for the interests of children is backfiring and proving the validity of the arguments of opponents of gay marriage.
The case for marriage equality is based on the obvious truth that homosexuals have loving relationships that, it is claimed, deserve official recognition. In other words, marriage should be opened up to include same-sex couples willing and able to live up to the meaning of marriage. There is an inherently conservative hue to this argument.
The case against gay marriage is that marriage establishes the right environment for the rearing of children by a mother and father. Gay activists respond that same-sex couples can be good parents. Critics who point out that children in same-sex families may forgo, to their detriment, the care of a mother or father are branded homophobic. By ignoring the substantive point, the welfare of children is set aside in favour of advancing the right of homosexuals and lesbians to be parents.
This is the disturbing significance of the controversial NSW birth certificate decision. That no gay spokesperson has expressed concern for the father and child stolen from each other speaks volumes about their priorities. Traditionalists have long argued in defence of marriage that the institution is fundamentally about the rights of children and that advocates of gay marriage just don’t get this. Based on the “sperm donor dad” case, they appear to have a point.
Jeremy Sammut is a research fellow at the Centre for Independent Studies.
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To whomever is willing to listen,
I am Tracy Nolan and in 1996, when I was 20, I had my first child, Isabella. Her father and I separated when
Isabella was about 2 and a half.
Her father, Anthony Tadros, is of Egyptian heritage and is very involved with not only the Egyptian community
but also the Coptic Orthodox church (Egyptian christian).
Whilst together Anthony and I had planned to be married twice, both times I cancelled, subsequently
humiliating him in front of the Egyptian community.
Shortly after separating from Anthony, I moved into a 3 bedroom house with Isabella, while Anthony continued
to live at home with his mother and siblings.
Approximately 6 months after we separated, Anthony decided to go for custody of Isabella and with his family’s
support, obtained custody of Isabella in 1999 due to instability on my part because of the fact I had just moved
into a rental property and they viewed Anthony’s parents owned residence as more stable. They also made up
claims that I had a gambling addiction, which was untrue.
When Isabella was almost 9 years old, she started telling me about the trouble she was having with her father’s
new wife, Sherien Tadros. She said Sherien was being physically abusive by digging her nails into my daughter
and twisted her ears, when nobody was watching. She also told me that her stepmother had accused Isabella
of molesting her little brother Michael Tadros, after putting powder on him after she changed his nappy.
The night before Isabella returned into my care, she rang me absolutely distraught saying Sherien was trying to
get into her bedroom and is making threats against her life, which I could clearly hear while I was on the phone
with Isabella.
The next morning I drove to my daughters school, where I picked her up as her father was dropping her to
school and told him Isabella was coming home with me, to stay. He had no objection.
Isabella was home with me for almost 4 years until late in December 2009, when on one of her sporadic access
visits with her father, he failed to return her. When I rang him to ask when he was going to bring her home, it
was then he informed me that he had no intention of returning Isabella, because she wanted to live with him
and that he would make sure I would never see her again.
I went into total shock, I was 35 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child, Trinity, at the time.
After trying desperately to contact Isabella by email and phone for the next 6 weeks, with no success, in mid
Febuary 2010, just 2 weeks after giving birth, I answered the door to police, informing me Anthony was applying
for an Intervention Order against me on behalf of Isabella.
It went to court at Dandenong Magistrates court on the 22nd of Febuary 2010.
After speaking with the duty solicitor and hearing the allegations that were being made against me in the
application, I broke down in tears, told the duty solicitor I wasn’t going to contest it if that’s what Isabella really
wanted. And walked out of the court absolutely beside myself, clutching my 3 weeks old baby.
During this time my 2nd eldest daughters father, Kirran Jones, was informed by Anthony of the fabricated
allegations and decided not to return Charlotte after an access visit and hid her from me so I couldn’t find
her for 2 weeks.
Little did I know Kirran and Anthony were in on it together.
I thought the matter was over and done with until I was out shopping with my 2 youngest daughters on the
10th of Septemer 2010, when I received a phone call from the Frankston Police. They asked me where I was
and could I come home. I said immediately and went straight home.
When I arrived home I was met by approximately 8 plain clothed detectives in bullet proof vests, I was reeling.
I immediately asked why they were here, towhich I was told that it was regarding Isabella. Tears welled up
in my eyes as I asked if she was ok, by then it had been 7 months since I had even heard her voice. The police
informed she was fine.
I went into my house with the dectectives, it was then they informed me that they had a search warrant for
my house and they proceeded to execute it, all in the presence of my 2 youngest children.
I was then informed that serious allegations of physical abuse had been made against me and that sexual
abuse allegations had been made against my partner, Christopher Lacco.
According to the police, I held a 9 millimetre gun to Isabella’s head and that was what they were searching
for. They said claims had been made that I stabbed Isabella in the back with a steak knife while she was doing
the dishes, I broke her nose by punching her in the face, then kicked her in the back. These were the most
serious allegations against me, there were several more but my partner was accused of digitally raping Isabella
and masturbating in front of her.
All VERY serious and disturbing allegations.
As the police were conducting their search a woman from Child Protection introduced herself as Cheryl Cornish
and proceeded then to take my 7 month old baby out of my arms and then took Charlotte, my 5 year old and
put them both in her car, saying she was taking Charlotte to her father, Kirran and Trinity would come with
them to the police station while the police interviewed me.
I was arrested and interviewed by Sen Con Robbie Culcott, all the while I could hear my baby in the room next
to me absolutely inconsolable as she had never spent a minute away from me since she was born.
Cheryl Cornish came in during a break in the interview and promptly told me to breast feed my baby quickly
to settle her down before she then, again, took my baby away from me, where she continued crying.
My mother Jennifer Butera, came up to the police station about 30 minutes later, where she was handed
Trinity until I finished my interview at approximately 9.30pm at night. My baby’s eyes were swollen from
crying and it took me a while to get her to calm down.
Then Cheryl Cornish came into the room my mother and I were in and told me that I was not to be unsupervised
with Trinity or Charlotte. So my mother supervised me with Trinity by moving into my house for 4 weeks and
a close friend from church, Mei Hall, was to supervise me during my time with Charlotte.
My partner, Chris, was not allowed anywhere near Charlotte and was not to be unsupervised with his 3
children, Trinty and 2 other children from a previous relationship.
It was during this time that Kirran, Charlotte’s was awarded 50% custody of Charlotte, based on the allegations.
He then informs me he will be moving down to Phillip Island and will be taking Charlotte with him and is going
full custody of her.
I tried desperately to stop this from happening but with allegations like this on the table, it made it easy for
him to gain full custody of her.
And in January 2011, final orders were to be made in the family court regarding custody of Charlotte. I am
told by my barrister that there is absolutely no point in taking it to trial because I will lose solely based on
the allegations made against my partner and I.
So Kirran was granted full custody and in the final orders it states that Chris is never to be around Charlotte,
ever.
I walk out of court, knowing that now I have lost 2 of my 3 children due to false allegations.
A few weeks later, I received a letter from the Frankston Police informing me they have done a thorough
investigation into the matter and had found absolutely no evidence to support the outrageous accusations
made against me and they were closing the case and were not pursuing it any further.
A little too late for me as the final hearing for Charlotte had already happened.
I decided to contest the application for an extention to the AVO Anthony had taken out against me on
Isabella’s behalf. It was heard at Dandenong magistrates court again in the middle of this year. It was
at this time, Isabella, was appointed an Independant Childrens lawyer, as the magistrate remarked, Isabella
should have her own voice and that she didn’t know if this was just a father trying to keep a daughter away
from her mother.
Then on approximately the 30th of August 2011, I went to the Childrens Court in the city and found her
father didn’t want to pursue the AVO for Isabella anymore but wanted a 5 year AVO for himself against me.
The magistrate asked Isabella what she wanted and my daughter replied ‘ I want to see my mum’. It was the
first time I had heard her voice in almost 20 months!!
The magistrate said to Isabella that she could see me towhich, Isabella asked the magistrate if she was allowed
to hug me, upon the judge saying yes, Isabella almost crashed tackled me saying she had been wanting to see
me this whole time but her father, Aunty and grandmother wouldn’t let her.
Isabella was residing with her paternal grandmother at the time and when she returned back there from
court, her grandmother kicked her out saying if Isabella wanted to have anything to do with me she should
pack her stuff and get out.
Isabella finally came home on the 30th of September 2011.
During this past 20 months Cheryl Cornish from Child Protection supported both Kirran and Anthony at court,
recommending that Isabella not be anywhere near me and that Kirran should get custody of Charlotte due
to my lack of insight into the seriousness of the allegations.
She told my partner, who is aboriginal, that she knows he did this to Isabella as it is ‘rampant in his community’
while she was interviewing Chris and I together.
We were also told by Cheryl that child protection doesn’t need evidence to take my other 2 children away, she
said if it were just ‘likely’ that it happened they could take action.
We were treated as though we were guilty and in the process my partner and I have been labelled abusers.
Since Isabella has come home she has told me how her father, Anthony, her Aunty Miriam Ekladious, who
is a school teacher, her grandmother, Leila Tadros and Charlotte’s father Kirran all conspired together and made
her make these allegations against my partner and I so Miriam could adopt Isabella and Kirran could get custody
of Charlotte.
During the 20 months that Isabella was gone she began self harming. She cut her arms and her legs and was
placed into psychiatric care for several weeks at The Stepping Stones Program at Monash Adolescent Psych
Unit.
She has shown me ‘scripts’ they made her write out before she spoke to DHS or the police, so she wouldn’t stuff
the story up.
She told me that when they were telling her what to say about my partner Chris, she had to ask them to
pull the car over so she could throw up. I ask her why she threw up and she said because of what they were
making her say. I asked her what happened next and she said even though they saw how much it upset
her to do it, they still drove her to the police station to give their scripted statement.
She has many minutes of recorded conversations between her father, herself and her grandmother, passively
aggressively telling her what they want her to do.
She told me that when my conspiritors found out my house had been searched and the 2 youngest girls were
taken off me they went out for celebratory drinks!!
They brainwashed Isabella into thinking I no longer loved her and if she didn’t go along with what they wanted
she would be homeless with nowhere to go.
So it seems as though their plan had succeeded, until my daughter found the courage 2 days ago to go the
police and tell them the truth.
Now she has to make a decision as to whether she is going to make a formal statement to police regarding
the conspiracy against me, which may see her father end up in prison. Too much for a 15 year old girl who has
been through so much psychologically, mentally and physically in the past 20 months but now is left with the
guilt of knowing what she was manipulated into saying has effectively meant me losing custody of her 5 year old
sister Charlotte. Who is not being cared for properly by her father. And desperately wants to come home.
She asks me regularly why her other 2 sisters live with me but she doesn’t, she wants to know what she did that
was so bad. Can you imagine what that is doing to her psyche?
I believe wholeheartedly that my story needs to be told, so that it can not only highlight the extent a bitter ex
partner will go to hurt you but also because our Child Protective Services are an absolute disgrace.
My whole family has been torn apart because of spite and revenge.
I cant even begin to articulate the heartache I have had to endure in watching my once normal family, be
obliterated in a second.
Or how hard it was to read the paper and learn of another child that DHS had failed to protect. I cant tell you
the number of times I hurt for the children that were really in trouble because of the resources they so
desperately needed, being wasted on me and my partner. We are by no means perfect but are
far from child abusers.
I am absolutely flabbergasted at how someone can deliberately make false allegations against you and have
your whole world turned upside down on absolutely no evidence.
The irony is Anthony Tadros has not paid his taxes in several years to avoid paying child support to me and
has psychologically damaged not only my 15 year old daughter but my innocent 5 year old too and Child
Protection were trying to keep my kids away from me!!
Now my 5 year old daughters father, Kirran Jones, is not allowing me to see Charlotte at all. Surely there is
something I can do?!?! He won’t even let me speak to her on the phone now.
He says that because Chris Lacco and I are still together, he doesn’t trust that the orders will be followed and
if I want to see Charlotte I should take him to court.
Now I have no idea when I will see my 5 year old daughter and I have no idea what he has told her and
how much she must be hurting not only for not seeing me but not hearing my voice. Or seeing her two sisters
Upon speaking to the Cowes Police Station they informed me that as the custodial parent, Kirran, can
keep her away from me if he thinks Charlotte is in danger.
What am I supposed to do now??????
I have been told by a solicitor it will cost me $2500 to file for a contravention of orders, which I cannot afford.
So unless I come up with $2500, I won’t be able to see my daughter. This can’t be right surely.
Isabella has decided to make a statement to Frankston CIU.
Please do not hesitate to contact me if you have advice or think that injustices like mine should be told.
Kindest Regards
Tracy Nolan
[Reply]
zac Reply:
February 3rd, 2012 at 1:43 pm
Tracy, sorry for your nightmare which is not uncommon. Similar things happened to me and my daughter..also born in 1996 and who selfharmed at 10 years old…now living with her abuser mother 130 km away from me in defiance of FM court orders.
If the police don’t act on your daughter’s last statement you have to write to the Superintendant at Frankston. I hope he/she is not as corrupt as the one that was in charge in the 1970′s..(according to my deceased father-in-law,,who was a senior cop.)
You have to be careful naming (shaming) even if you’re 100% sure of your facts…. there is a shit load of hearsay, from children, in you’re story and you have to be careful how you use their stories…true or contrived. Remember..members of Victoria Police child protection have acknowledged that AT LEAST 20% of child abuse notifications are FOUND to be spurious claims made in custody wars.. the way you tell your story you’re first in line of the 20%.
If I was you, I would wait till Isabella’s statement has had it’s effect and then I would make a self represented Contravention Application to restore contact with Charlotte…download the forms and follow the pretty simple steps.
Stay calm Tracy.. I know how it feels to be disallusioned by the rules of disengagement in our ‘free’ society. Best of luck to you and daughters.
[Reply]
zac Reply:
February 3rd, 2012 at 1:54 pm
I mean that you are a victim of false stories, NOT a teller of false stories.
[Reply]
A message from the chair of the Senate Committee into the Family law (Family Violence) Bill – the “Hate Men” law – which effectively repeals the presumption of innocence for men and legalises perjury
ALP Senator Trish Crossin
“The Federal Governemnt announced today the appointment of a Global Ambassador for Women and Girls. This puts Australia at the forefront of global efforts to promote the role of women and girls and to have someone advocate on their behalf and to ensure the needs of women and girls are properly represented in Australia’s overseas development program and in foreign policy more broadly.”
[Reply]
JOIN US IN THE FIGHT,
WE ARE INVITING ALL FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO JOIN WITH US TO BUILDING A NATION NETWORK SUPORTING GOOD FATHERS.
REGISTER and BECOME A MEMBER OF FATHERS UNION of AUSTRALIA
You are not alone; please don’t hesitate to ask for support http://www.fathersunionaustralia.com
[Reply]
I am astounded by the lack of fathers standing up for their rights in this country.
I am about to led through this legal hellhole by a vindictive and spiteful ex who sees this all as a way to get her hands on everything we own and should i say anything then she will start up with the lies to have my access to my kid removed.
I would gladly go and stand and picket outside parliament house and cause a huge stink to get myself on the TV.
Like you say, if no one knows then nothing will ever be done in this feminist man hating country.
[Reply]
Paw Reply:
September 5th, 2011 at 4:56 pm
Mick,
You are not alone Mate and there are so many who would help out too, if only we could get the word out.
But sadly, I do have to admit that there is a degree of what appears to be apathy in Aus with men/fathers fighting this feminist govt and laws.
The problem is for too long men have been treated like criminals, that most men are simply too afraid to do anything, because they know that as soon as their exes find out, the exes will go to court and have the kids removed from them altogether.
The abuse just goes on and on.
There is also the other group of men/fathers who are lucky enough to still be married and have the luck of being able to stay with their children. These men are staying away, because they don’t want to rock the boat and live in hope that it will never happen to them.
Almost all men know full well that they are at the mercy of the woman they have married and anytime she decides she’s had enough of them, they will lose everything.
It’s okay for women to get out there and protest about any issue, because it is seen as empowering and “You go girl” bullshit. But if men protest, the attacks are from womens groups and feminist politicians, accusing men of being aggressive, and trying to bring back the dark days of patriarchy.
We are damned if we do, and we are damned if we don’t.
What we need, is the VERY SILENT majority of women to start to fight for their innocent male family members and the children involved. Then we might get somewhere.
Don’t be too angry at all the men Mate, because most are too afraid to have a go, because they know they may lose their kids altogether, and the other men are staying away, because they are hoping like hell it will never happen to them.
[Reply]
Howard Beale Reply:
September 5th, 2011 at 6:49 pm
In my humble opinion men just don’t know what is happening until it happens to them, and even then they don’t believe it, then it is too late and any objections are silenced by a “protection” order.
Men wait and expect the family court to provide justice. $100K later when they realise what the Court is they want to stay as far away as possible from the persecution of “in the best interests of the child” – more akin to “Work will set you Free” on the death camp gate.
It is left to a few part-timers to fight against a multi-billion dollar family law-domestic violence industry with professional lobbyists paid by government to cry “family violence” wolf and more funding.
Note the 260:40 submissions to the Senate in favour of the Family Violence Bill and Chief Justice Bryant’s response to family law amendments repealing the presumption of innocence and legalising perjury – “when do they start and how much extra funding do we get”?
And try getting the newspapers to publish counterarguments or even comments.
We need a Minister for Men and through that office access to funding before we can hope to stop the demonising of fathers. We have to put food on the table and do not have the 9-3pm freetime to change public opinion.
[Reply]
kyle Reply:
September 13th, 2011 at 3:40 pm
@ Mick / Paw / Howard — If any posts ever read truer to me RIGHT NOW, in the mental & physical position I am in right now, it is yours.
I tried writing to current affairs programs and the media, but no responses.
I wish the four of us could meet and then work out how in partnership we would convince one of the media-avenues to do this story.
The best of all would be a session of debate on Q&A. Again, so many of the men would be so afraid to speak the real truth on it for fear of retribution from their own Magistrates, Lawyers and any family report writers that got wind of their appearance.
If you haven’t yet, I suggest you consider the option of helping form new courts. I cannot see any other way.
Yes, I will sit on Parliament house steps with you.
What state do you live in Mick?
Aaron Reply:
September 13th, 2011 at 5:49 pm
Kyle,
I hear you, I just went from basically share care to an 80 / 20 split in her favour, the magistrate was an old mind, you made it clear he does not support share care or responsibility. Happy to protest
Kyle Reply:
September 20th, 2011 at 4:49 pm
Well, Aaron,
I went from wife taking off with child(then supported by some new friends she made), to getting a bad negotiation day in court, but some time with my child.
Lawyers who were rude to me, the ones on my side I must say.
One, my first one, once burst out with (said out of nowhere) on her getting a little flustered while she paced around her office seemingly in a form of control (now I know differenty) “Shut up, you are not giving orders to your wife anymore ! ”
A moment not to forget for me !!
Then my wife allows me equal time with my child – for some lengthy time. That was a breath of fresh air. Though I wanted more time. And she simply put him in child care.
Now I am back in court again so looks like getting really difficult again. Really bad. When she sits back and enjoys the attention she gets and the favour she gets.
Quolls Reply:
September 5th, 2011 at 6:48 pm
JOIN US,
WE ARE INVITING ALL FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO JOIN WITH US TO BUILDING A NATION NETWORK SUPORTING GOOD FATHERS.
REGISTER and BECOME A MEMBER OF FATHERS UNION of AUSTRALIA
You are not alone; please don’t hesitate to ask for support http://www.fathersunionaustralia.com
[Reply]
Aaron Reply:
September 6th, 2011 at 12:08 am
Mick,
I have just been smashed through the family court, I had a 6/8 split, but lots of lies from my ex wife and a lot of bad behaviour from her coupled with a lazy magistrate (who made mistakes in the text and contradicted himself constantly in his own orders) who openly commented he is not a share care advocate, meant I got the standard man package and lost precious time with my children.
I too am with you, I have never been a protestor, but now I will protest loudly through a barrage of letters to politicians, letters to the editor of newspapers, feedback forums, just to everyday joes to try and change the imbalance so that honest men can enjoy seeing their children grow, just like the honest (and dishonest lying mothers) can.
Good luck my friend, you are in for a painful struggle, hopefully one day, others dont have to walk the path we have. But a word to those men who do the worng thing, I will never support your poor behaviour and will protest against you too, as your stupid actions, make it so hard for the honest hard working family man.
[Reply]
Heh…news just in some fella apparently strapping a bomb to himself and a child at the family court in Sydney.
Probably another poor bloke pushed to the edge by the system.
I can see where this is going to go..”Family violence bill justified after dad straps bomb to kid”.
[Reply]
Paw Reply:
September 5th, 2011 at 4:10 pm
Yep, this is only going to make it a whole lot worse for fathers!
[Reply]
There is also a belief out there that if the situation was reversed 180 deg that men/fathers would behave exactly the same as women.
Personally, I do not subscribe to that belief totally. I believe that most of what happens is female specific behaviour and only seen in a smaller minority of men in other instances. Most men would not behave in this fashion.
When men had this position decades ago, women were never publicly vilified, or had restraining orders placed against them, or had them thrown in prison because the ex husband told a lie about them. These things never happened, but yet we see women doing this on a regular basis today and it is all with the blessings of the courts and govt.
What this country needs, is not only a presumption of shared “Physical care”, but also very serious punitive measures that must be used against those who make false claims of DV and child abuse and who commit perjury. There must be a prison sentence and not just loss of custody or access. The deterrant must be worth it, to stop these cowards from doing the evil things they do against innocent fathers.
The above article is more of a summary of what has occurred over the last 30 odd years and it is quite accurate. I was first in the system in 1987 and again in 2006, just at the same time of the new Howard changes. And boy, was there a difference between outcomes in both these cases.
In my 2006 case, substantial, but then 50/50 shared care was achieved, and after a short time, I ended up the major carer because the children knew which was the better home for them to be in. This was not orchestrated by me and it was also agreed to by the feminist father hating divorce court. The court had no choice, because the children voted with their feet.
Suffice to say, my children from my first marriage/case, have been completely alienated from me by the mother and it is now 24 years since I have had any meaningful contact.
All of this is the criminal behaviour of a vicious woman who was given permission to use children as a weapon against me.
I agree with the author of this article about the total lack of acknowledgement from all the other homos (male/female they are both the same), regarding the true welfare of any children involved. All these selfish people are screaming about is THEIR right to do whatever they want and they want to do it at any cost.
Marriage is not to be used for this abhorrent practice. Go find another category to call yourselves where you can live your disordered lives away from the lives of innocent children.
If you want children, then give up this life of abomination, get married to a member of the ‘OPPOSITE SEX’ and have your own children and you can do so with the blessing of those of us in society.
And it still amazes me today that there are no women out there (in general I am talking about) who are standing alongside fathers fighting for the rights of children and their fathers. Yes there are a handful and they are wonderful, but the other 90 odd % of women in this country are dead silent on this issue.
Why???
[Reply]
Old Tom Reply:
September 5th, 2011 at 1:59 pm
What about the thousands of single fathers who also remain silent?
You mention there are a few wonderful women standing alongside fathers fighting for the rights of their children. But where are these fathers you speak of and where is this fight? Tell me where to go and I will join!!!!
We’ve seen the new “family violence” bill get muscled through parliament without even a hint of media coverage. I bet 99% of this population wouldnt even know it is happening and I bet a great percentage of divorced fathers wouldnt know either.
If fathers and children are so massively done over by these new laws then why arent there any protests, public gatherings and marches?
Surely it cant be that bad as NOTHING is being done by the fathers/children this is affecting.
In fact…going by this logic, then surely the recent American style child beauty pageants being staged here are a far more important topic than family law because people ACTUALLY got off their arses and organized protest over this.
Quite frankly, I am sick and tired of the men of this country whinging in the shadows about this mess. We obviously have incredible numbers to make a huge difference and to be heard and to start proper debate on this, but history shows that nothing will be done.
I have a lot of things happening at the moment with regards to child custody which will be sorted out (hopefully) soon. Regardless of the outcome, when this is sorted I plan on doing something about this mess because nobody else will. I am HOPING that the fathers of Australia realise that it is in their best interests and get behind this and support the cause.
Paw, you are a very passionate person and my comments are in no way directed at you, but it just frustrates me that all we have to do is stand up for ourselves and a difference can be made. Heck look at the divorce rate and the way men get done over. We’re not short on possible recruits thats for sure.
Take care.
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Paw Reply:
September 5th, 2011 at 2:18 pm
Old Tom,
All your obvservations are well founded and true, but I would like to further qualify this with a bit more of my own opinion if I may.
You pointed out the one major reason why fathers are not engaged, which is the lack of public debate/knowledge due to zero media coverage. The ‘baby modelling’ fiasco was in the media well before the little girl in question even touched our soil, so it was an open invitation to most groups who wanted to have a say.
However, if you change the above issue into a family law issue, then just about all submissions to the media by mens/fathers/family groups, are vetoed by Editors of all media outlets. Nothing gets through!
And just to correct you on a couple of points:
There have been many, many men over the last 30 years fighting this evil and they have not been able to achieve a single solitary win. They got a patheticly small change to these laws in 2006, when the coward Howard caved in to the womens groups and introduced changes that hardly made a difference. However, they did make some difference and some children/fathers benefitted. Some, not many!
Then there is your statement about women.
Well, women in this country read magazines and talk to each other like there is no tomorrow. You know this yourself.
I would almost go out on a limb here and say that I don’t believe there would be too many women in this country, who do not know their rights in family law, or at least know that the court and law will weigh in their favour.
If any woman is not fully apprised by what they can get in the family court, there is a huge number of organisations, law firms, govt officials, the media and other women, who can fill them in and help them screw over their ex husband.
I will never accept that women in general in Aus, are that ignorant of what is going on. And I would like to know why they are so damn silent on this issue, when their own male family members and children are having their lives destroyed by other women and the family court.
Hopefully one day someone in media will have the balls to print some good articles and help get men organised. IF this day ever occurs, I think you will find that many men will get on board.
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Mothers dont have to be determined to end a fathers access to their children, it is encouraged. Indeed, CSA have policies that punish women if they don’t seek means to restrict such access. Organisations such as CSA and Centrelink actively encourage, assist and collude with women to “redistribute wealth” and the family law system, full of corrupt and self-interested lawyers do the rest. In fact, my ex’s solicitor even told her how to exclude me from legal support in my local area, forcing me to travel more than 50km to get support at $300 per hour or more. Even community legal centres buy into this conflict of interest games, so organisations like social security rights victoria will even exclude fathers and children from support if the mother contacts them first.
The judge that made this decision, in my opinion is lacking in moral and ethical common sense and should be removed.
I don’t have an opinion on gay marriage just yet, but I do believe that the parents that match the DNA of the child are the biological parents and should both have equal rights… Not so in Australia, the land of the perverted, corrupt and gender biased family system. Australia is not a nice place to live.
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